Playing Royal: A Vice Agency Novel Read online

  My eyes sting a little. It’s been a long time since I’ve let myself think about them. Until that day in the garden. That’s why he asks, and I tell him only because I forced him to be real with me. At least a little, however briefly. “After that, my stepmother raised me.”

  “What was she like?” His voice is soft, filled with concern.

  “Awful.” I give him a tight smile, focusing on his face. “I thought it was me. For a long time, I thought it was my fault that she hated me, but the woman is just plain mean. I don’t think she’s capable of loving anyone if it doesn’t suit her needs. Maybe not even my father.”

  “It definitely wasn’t you, Princess.” He curls his hand around the back of my neck and rests his head against mine. “I don’t think any normal person could keep from caring about you.”

  My heart flutters. But I know he doesn’t mean him. That he’s talking in general terms, or fantasy terms. I don’t even need to ask whether it’s real or not. These are our rules. This game still an abundance of half-truths hidden under one careless wish to be his princess, even if only for a night.

  “Those boys back there adored you.”

  “They were great,” I tell him. “What your company does for those kids is amazing. I’ve been homeless and desperate. I only wish there’d been a place like that when I needed it.”

  After I’d been introduced to all the boys they’d showed me around the sprawling ranch. First inside, and then we’d gone out to feed the horses, while Leo, the boy who had announced me as the hottie, told me all about how Saran and Vice ran this place so they could help the kids stay off the streets and out of trouble. And how each of the Vice team took turns spending time with the boys.

  At that point he’d firmly shut his mouth after a scathing look from Kaiser, and I had to assume there was some secret that only the people involved were allowed to know. When we finally left a couple hours ago, I’d hugged most of them and told them I hoped to come back. I almost felt bad about telling them that. Chances are I’ll never see them again, even though I would like to.

  “So what about you? You said you lost someone?”

  A flicker of pain crosses his features. “You caught that?”

  I touch his chest, my fingers flexing on the cotton of his T-shirt. I want to reach down and lift it up, I want to get my hands on his hard flesh and offer him comfort. “I did. I didn’t know if it was—”

  “Fact.” His voice is raw, guttural. Some of what’s happening here is fantasy. It has to be to feel this good, this magical. But the emotion conveyed in that one word can’t be faked. He grasps my chin with his fingers. “My brother. He passed away five years ago.”

  “And that’s why you do this fantasy thing?”

  “Part of it.” His fingers keep moving from my jaw to my throat, to the dip between my clavicle. Sparks light up everywhere he touches.

  “What about your family? Don’t they miss you?” I shuffle a little closer to him.

  “They might. They’re probably more disappointed than anything. My brother was supposed to take over the family business. When he died it fell to me.”

  “You didn’t want it?”

  “Nah, Princess, I didn’t want it.” He runs his fingers down between my tits, his gaze locked on where he’s touching me.

  My nipples harden, my breasts aching as they rise with each unsteady breath I draw. I’m probably not supposed to be turned on while he’s talking about something so sad, but his touch surpasses everything. “What did you want?”

  He gives me this funny little smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. “Nothing. Absolutely nothing, but to be left alone.”

  “That’s why you do this.” The words come out strangled as the blunt tip of one finger circles a nipple through the sheer camisole.

  “My rules.” He pinches the hard point, making me whimper before moving on to the other. “Be a damn ghost, don’t get involved, stick to the plan. They were easy to keep when all I had to do was pretend for a woman.”

  I almost tell him I’m sorry for making him break his rules, but the fact that he is makes my chest swell. I don’t want him closed off from me. All I’ve ever wanted is to know who he is. Even knowing that he sleeps with women for money, that he titillates them with whatever fantasy they long to see come true, I’m drawn to him. What does it matter who he fucks when all I want is to have a piece of him myself? That’s where this thing is leading, nothing more, nothing less. “What are the rules for? Why do you need them? You said you were protecting your new life, but why?”

  “Because it means freedom. I’m not a free man, Allie. Even before I made up my own rules, I had rules and responsibilities governing my life. And I can’t just be someone else. I can’t ever fully walk away. I don’t think I could even if I was given the choice.”

  I struggle to understand where he’s coming from. My life hasn’t been easy. There have certainly been moments where I wanted to run away, but I’ve never tried to be someone I’m not. Still, the sadness in his eyes makes me wonder what a man like him could possibly want to run away from. “It must have been awful. Your life before, to make you want crave solitude, to not want to let anyone in.”

  “Who says I don’t want to let anyone in?”

  His knuckles scrape down to the edge of my top, and my belly flutters in response. “You said it. Your rules. Be a damn ghost. How are you supposed to be anything other than alone if you’re a ghost?”

  “It’s not that easy,” he says, lifting my camisole over my head. “Right now, I’m just a man playing out a fantasy with a girl. But it can’t last forever, or even much longer than right now. The life I walked away from, it’s still there waiting for me. At some point I’ll go back. There’s no point in pretending I won’t, and I can’t take this life with me when I do. But that doesn’t mean I want to be alone. It just means I am.”

  The idea of never seeing him again bites a little. But what did I expect? I knew going into this it was only temporary. I shouldn’t have expected anything. I only get to pretend I have him a little while. But it’s only make-believe.

  “So what now?” My whole body tightens and releases when he smooths his hands down my sides to grasp my ass and pull me to him, hard. I can feel his erection pressed between us and it sends a corresponding rush of liquid fire that pools between my thighs.

  “Now, I want you for the rest of the afternoon. Each and every position I can have you in, and I’m not going to stop until we’ve tried all of them. Maybe not even then.”

  “Here? Out in the open?” But he’s pushing me down on the leather seat of the motorcycle, and it doesn’t feel awkward like I would have imagined. My pulse races faster at the idea he wants me and he doesn’t want to wait.

  His body curled over mine, he winds a path with his mouth over each tit. Sucking and licking until I’m writhing, needy and aching to be torn apart by him, and he has to clamp a hand to my side to keep me from falling off the bike.

  His mouth leaves my tits, nipping along my throat, the vibration of a soft groan working its way through my insides. His, mine? I’m not entirely sure as he takes my mouth, his tongue demanding my response. I clasp his head, my fingers digging into his hair while I cling to him, and he pops the button on my jeans. Then he grips the waist and yanks them down. As tight as they are, he still has them down over my hips with one swift movement. My panties follow before his hand cups my pussy. “What does it feel like to have my hand on your cunt? Do you like it, Princess?”

  My nerve endings catch fire, and my pussy throbs from the firm hold he has on it. He sucks my bottom lip into his mouth, but he doesn’t move his fingers. It’s the worst possible torture in the world. The heat of his palm covers my slit, making my body pulse with need. I want him to stroke me, to plunge his digits inside me, to ease the ache that builds with each second he does nothing to relieve me.

  Biting my lip, I whimper. My hips buck as my body seeks the pleasure he’s denying me. “Please. More.”

  “Mor
e?” His gaze is hooded behind heavy lids as he steps back and stares at his hand over my entrance. “Fuck, you’re perfect.”

  I cry out as he slips a finger inside, stroking the most sensitive part of me. I grind down on his hand, unable to stop my reaction even if I wanted to. Then he twists in and out of me, his thumb flicking lightly over my clit again and again. Grabbing onto him, I hold on for dear life as I jerk around on the back of the bike. I can feel my orgasm building already, the pleasure heightening so quickly, I can’t contain it.

  “I can’t wait to get my mouth on you, my tongue inside you. I’m going to fuck you so hard.”

  “Please.” That’s what I want. I don’t want to wait, but his words drive me on as his fingers fuck deep inside me with hard strokes. His palm hitting my clit sends spirals of sensation ricocheting through me until the pressure is so much I shut my eyes.

  His voice is low as he bows over me again, his hand plastered to my side, tethering me to him. “Open your eyes and scream for me, Allie. I want to see the look in your eyes when you cum.”

  It’s his eyes, his intensely green lust filled gaze that sends me soaring over the edge. It’s his fingers pushed deep inside me that tears me apart. It’s his teeth biting into my shoulder that makes me scream as I cum. And it’s his arms that catch me when I crash down from the highest orgasm I’ve ever had.

  “Holy shit,” I whisper.

  He grins as he slides my pants back up and fixes the button. “Only a start, Princess. The things I’m going to do to you.” He hands me my top. “You want them, don’t you?”

  “All, everything. Now.” I slip back into my camisole, unable to gather my scattered wits. Maybe I’ve never really felt before. I certainly haven’t had a ton of experience, but he’s more than I expected.

  “So beautifully eager, aren’t you?” He slips his thumb along my bottom lip, and I dart my tongue over it, needing to taste him. A low groan rumbles in his chest. “Greedy girl. I know you expect me to shell out the goods for you, like…”

  Like the other women who pay for his time? It’s hard to remember that I’m just another one of those women. I don’t know how to feel about the fact that he might be treating me differently. It’s not like it means anything. This is only one more game. Our time has to be coming to its end.

  He shrugs, thrusting my jacket toward me and climbing on the bike. “Patience, Princess, you’ll get what you want. Now come hold onto me. We need to get back.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Kaiser

  Every minute I spend is a minute I’ll never get back. A minute I don’t want to have back. Seeing her fall apart for me undid something inside me. I clasp her hands around my waist tighter, unable to keep my hands off her.

  I wanted to, well, I thought I was going to fuck her. I thought, out there in the open I’d take what I needed from her, and then I’d disappear as surely as I appeared. That’s why today was only meant to be the trip out to the ranch and a pit stop on the way back. Now, we’re speeding toward her apartment, and I don’t want this ride to end. I don’t want to fuck her yet, not when that will be the end of my time with her.

  No, I need another plan. This time between Allie and I doesn’t feel like a Vice game, and I don’t want it to be. What we’re doing is real. It’s something I want to immerse myself in fully while I can. So my time with Vice, this role I’ve played in their games has to end, because there’s no way I can continue working to fulfil women’s fantasies when my only fantasy is to spend my time with Allie.

  I drive down dirty streets in a rough part of town. My hackles rise with each passing mile. She lives down here. Someone as precious as she is shouldn’t have to worry about being mugged each time she leaves her home. She shouldn’t have to worry about the drug addicts waiting on the corner of her street when she gets home late at night from work.

  I’ve seen the good and the bad in this world. I’ve seen what can happen when people are desperate. That’s not something I’m willing to look away from. Not in my country, and not here either.

  She points over my shoulder at a building, a little way up the street. “There.”

  The complex looks like it should be knocked down, not rented out. I fight the intense desire to keep going, to take her back to my own apartment. The kind of place where she should be living. I pull the bike to the curb. “You live here?”

  “Yes.” She climbs off the bike. “It’s not much, but it’s my place.”

  “You don’t belong here.” I grasp her hand.

  “Actually, I do.” She has to yank out of my grip to get me to let go. “It’s better than the streets. Better than what I had when I lived with my stepmother.”

  For some reason this girl is destroying me. Pulverizing my brain into pieces that don’t work together to keep me indifferent anymore. “Allie, this isn’t good enough.”

  “Sure it is.” She folds her arms under her tits and scowls. “This is the real world, my real world. It’s probably not much compared to what you have, or anything compared to the life you live through Vice, but this is it for me. Please don’t belittle it.”

  “I meant it isn’t good enough for you.” I clear my throat. “You deserve better.”

  “Do I?” She bites her lip and glances behind her. “That must be easy to say when you don’t really know me.”

  For a moment, I expect her to say something else. Her fingers glide along the handle grip. I want her to tell me that she doesn’t want to go up to her apartment, or that this game we agreed would only be once, isn’t enough. It isn’t enough for me.

  “Goodbye, Kaiser,” she whispers.

  I watch her move a few steps away. It’s not acceptable. This isn’t how I want it to go. I’m off my bike and catching her up before she can get to the door to the building. “Another game? Another round, Allie?” I already feel like I know so much about her. It only makes me want to know more. “When will you come to me again?”

  “I can’t.” Standing with her keys in her hand, her mouth twisted, she doesn’t look at me. “I don’t want to keep playing these fantasy games. Even if I did I can’t afford to. Besides, what’s the point? Why do you want to drag this out when you’re the one who keeps saying it can’t be more than one night?”

  There’s no point. Not really. She’s right that it’s supposed to be nothing, but that doesn’t change the fact I want to see her again. I’m fighting with my rules and Vice’s, and I’m not even sure why.

  “Just one more time? Be my fantasy. Let me be the one who pretends they can have you in their world for a smattering of time.”

  “I don’t know.” She glances up at me through her lashes. “I don’t know if it’s a good idea.”

  “Then let me come up.” I grip her arm and pull her against me. I know the game’s over and I’m pushing at the last barrier that keeps this from becoming something I can’t have a part in, but I’m not ready to walk away.

  “I can’t. I have to get ready for work.”

  Grasping her hair in my hand, I tug her head back and smash my mouth to hers, pouring every ounce of want into the kiss. She sears me with her heat, deep in the parts of me I keep buried. Her sweetness, her neediness fills my senses as she whimpers.

  When I pull away she’s breathless and rosy. I stroke my thumb across her glistening bottom lip. “One more time, Allie, because I want it.”

  “One week.” She exhales. “One more game. But you better be ready for me, mister five times in one night. It’ll be the last time.”

  Then she disappears inside, and I lean on the bike staring up at the building long after she’s no doubt made it to her apartment. I’ll be ready for her, but not how she expects. There’s no way I can only see her one more time.

  Kicking the bike to life, I head back to the Vice offices. If I’d thought I’d seen Saran pissed before, I’m sure I’m about to see Chernobyl up close and personal.

  ***

  Taking a seat at one of the dimly lit booths toward the back of The Pa
lace, I watch her work. Every which way I turn my beautiful Allie has me going against my better judgement. A ridiculous situation, bearing in mind I’ve spent my entire life being groomed to make the right choices for my family, for my country. She is not the right choice. She is most definitely not the woman for me.

  I can vividly picture my father’s scowl, the words he would use to describe her and this tryst I’m involving myself in. The shame I’m bringing upon my family even considering her as I do. Not to mention what he would have to say about Vice, and what I’ve done these past five years. Although, as long as it never came out to the public, that would go down easier for the king than pursuing a woman with no social significance in our world.

  “Damn it, Leo. I wish you were still here,” I mutter into my beer. Everything would be simpler with my older brother to take the crown, but the asshole had to go and get himself killed. And for what? Love. Impractical, utterly ridiculous love with a girl who was so far beneath him he could never have married her, for a girl who had gotten herself into so much trouble that he’d been killed trying to get her out of it.

  “Stalking our bar wench, Kaiser?” Liam thumps down opposite me and pushes another pint my way, a sly grin on his face. “I’m not entirely sure I’m happy with you taking up space just so you can keep tabs on a bit of tail.”

  “I’m not so sure I give a shit what you think.” I lean back in the booth and tap out a beat with my fingers on the edge of the table. “I certainly never have, don’t plan to start now.”

  “What about her? Do you think she might care?” He points a thumb in her direction, and I find she’s watching us, her gaze narrowed on me as she pours out shots for a couple at the bar. For all the time we’ve spent together like this, this is the first time she doesn’t seem all that pleased to see me.

  “Never mind, I think we’re about to find out.” Chuckling, he gets up and heads back to take over the bar as she makes her way toward me.